Anger is inevitable. And in some, albeit rare, cases, it’s helpful. Like, when we’re trapped under a fallen tree. In these situations we can use anger to our advantage physiologically, to help us do more, become stronger and survive. In these moments, our reactive instincts take over. And, this is a good thing. But otherwise, anger only gets in the way. It stands between us and the ability to calmly sort things out and make things better. As adults, we know what makes us angry. And we also know it’s going to happen. We just don’t know when it’s going to happen. The questions is, what to do with anger? And more importantly, when to answer this question.
It turns out, all anger can be dealt with in advance. It’s quite straightforward actually. We can choose what to do with anger before it shows up. In life threatening situations, we can choose to let our instinctive reactions take control and act angry with purpose. Or, with practice (lots of practice), we can choose to control less threatening situations differently. We can lead with a thoughtful, calm analysis and response, which will help make things better. We can choose to act responsibly…as in take responsibility for the situation moving forward. This of course is a heavy burden, especially if we are feeling wronged. But, if we really care about improving things, feeling less stress and living into the person we hope to become, the choice is simple. Choose wisely.