gift giving

Gift Giving

A gift is meant to be unconditional, an untethered act of care and gratitude. Most often we think of a gift as a form a payment for someone's care, generosity, friendship or selfless act. It's a response. In some cases, it's a reaction to their gift. And, it becomes an exchange...a symbol of mutual thanks and respect. In any case, an offering of gratitude to someone we know is first and foremost an empathetic act, and one which shouldn't require a response, but sometimes comes with one.

The gifts which are less talked about are those we offer to strangers. It might be a simple smile to a passerby. Or, it might be extra effort at work to help a colleague. It might be the gift of life for a child we yet do not know. Or, it might be making a customer feel extra special. These generous acts are also unconditional, which is what makes them gifts. Otherwise, they're deposits, investments with hopes of a return.

People which choose a true gift giving posture as their culture are often referred to as "kind people". They seem to care more. It's helpful to recognize and emphasize their choice to act this way. They don't have to. And, no, they aren't genetically predisposed to be this way. They simply want to. They want to serve someone. Perhaps, they haven't always been this way (there's a good chance they have not). Perhaps, they developed habits of gratitude through practice and persistence because they understood the benefits of a gift giving culture. Perhaps, they stumbled along the way, but found a way to carry on. Perhaps it's what drives them, excites them and makes them happy.

The benefits of unconditional generosity are undeniable. Gift givers are more successful on every measure. And those around them are as well. And, the only cost is to care first for another more than ourselves. We know this to be tough...merely look at the world around us. Regretfully, we might not even need to look too far.

Every day we can choose to change things for the better. And adopting a gift giving posture is a good way to start...and to end. Choose wisely.

The Art of Gift Giving

The foundation of hospitality is gift giving...doing more for others than for yourself. What is often overlooked is timing...giving when it's most important for the recipient and not necessarily convenient for you. There's very little art in heaping on the expected smiles, catch phrases and giving someone trinkets. The art happens when you go out of your way to do something meaningful...for the moment. That's remarkable. Unfortunately, you can't do this by reading a script. It requires expertise in picking up clues and then acting upon them. Oddly enough, the clues are gifts themselves. So it becomes an exchange...call it improv. The key is to do something, to act, perhaps go out on a limb, to complete the exchange. Without action, the gift of the clue is wasted. What a shame. 

What makes the story of the video so remarkable is the surprise action by the young man at the end. The real heros might be his parents...thank you.